TOO INDEPENDENT

“I love her ‘cause she got her own….She don’t need mine, so she leaves mine alone. There ain’t nothin’ that’s more sexy… Than a girl that want, but don’t need me.” I need you to close your eyes and picture me singing that with a sexy voice ( Now that I got the ladies panties wet… let’s get down to business). The Urban dictionary defines an INDEPENDENT WOMEN as “a woman who pays her own bills, buy her own things, and does not allow a man to affect her stability or self-confidence. She supports herself entirely and is proud to be able to do so." Nowhere in that definition does it say she is way too sure of herself, extremely eager to express her opinion (and demolish yours); nor does it say she is an obnoxious, know-it-all pain in the ass. The problem with so many “TOO INDEPENDENT” women is that they want to control everything and reduce their men to being boys. They think they know the answer to everything Who, What, When, Where, and, Why. Men hate that sh!t with a passion.. Women that are TOO INDEPENDENT do not leave room for compromise. Or better, they see “compromise” as “he must change for me” or “he must adapt to my life style”. I think men will compromise, but if he sees that he is the only one making compromises, very soon he will start to question his role in the relationship. Seriously are we a companion, or an accessory? Ladies you have to allow your men to be men. The same way women are instinctively nurturers men are instinctively providers. It’s in a man’s nature to protect and provide, and when you don’t allow him to do that he starts to feel as if he’s not wanted or needed. Why in the hell would someone stick around where they’re not wanted or needed? Men aren’t intimidated by an INDEPENDENT WOMEN. So don’t think that’s the case… men are repelled by women who are unable to turn off her ego and attitude. These women are considered TOO INDEPENDENT.

Look ladies I’m not saying being Independent is a bad thing… Hell it's a great thing, but being TOO INDEPENDENT is the problem. I truly understand that black women (keep it 100 that’s who I’m talking about here) have a history of working 1 or 2 jobs to support themselves, and then come home to work a full time job as a mother (love you mom). I understand that there are some sorry ass dudes out there who have left you to raise kids and to take care of all of the bills on your own. I understand that due to these past events in history you feel like in order to get things done, you’ve had to rely upon yourself. As a result of this, you feel like you really don’t need a man. You have to get over that and let a real man be a man..
I will be totally honest with you. We need each other; hell men and women were made to be together. Look at the equipment God has blessed us with: it fits so perfectly together (well in most cases…lol). A strong man and a strong woman should make a powerful combination, but when a woman is TOO INDEPENDENT there’s no compromise or communication. That's when two strong people develop a power struggle and it drives them apart.

There is nothing wrong with being a successful, driven, INDEPENDENT woman. Ladies you should never put your life or career on hold because a man feels inferior to you, but at the same time there is no need to drive a good man away by being TOO INDEPENDENT. I’m going to end this with a verse from one of my favorite songs… This is the second verse on Musiq Soulchild’s last alum ONMYRADIO the song is called “SOMEONE”….
All that I hope for a friendship that´s so pure
A girl I can talk to bout
whatever is on my heart
A woman that needs me
That trust and believes me
That won’t take my kindness as
some kind of weakness
A woman who bares her soul who
is willing to let go
That wants me to lead her but
knows how to take control
And when I am feeling down
Cause things are going wrong
She fills me up and makes me feel strong
THERE ARE GOING TO BE TIMES WHEN A MAN MAY SLIP AND FALL, AND IT’S GOING TO TAKE A STRONG WOMAN TO HELP HIM UP…. CAN YOU BE THAT WOMAN?

These are JUST MY THOUGHTS.....